Going along with the theme of relationships, we wanted to highlight romantic relationships a few times because, after all, this is the month of love (Valentine’s Day). This week, however, we are throwing one out for the single ladies!
As I write this, about half of the people on our team are single, including yours truly.
Being single is definitely not the most exciting thing on earth, but I believe many people downplay their singleness. Many people, even I, at one point or another, have thought that those who are single are second-class citizens, somehow incomplete. My family and friends are constantly asking when I will find the “right one”. Cultural pressure and personal pressure really do build up and singleness can start to feel like a burden.
I have never dated and I have never had a man ask me out. I have to admit it is hard because I start to wonder if I am invisible and I wonder what is wrong with me that could cause me to be so overlooked. The more I grew closer to God, the more I realized there was not a problem with me at all.
To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted; A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace. – Ecclesiastes 3:1-8
This is a famous passage that people often use. It does not go without cause here either. God has a time for everything and He has an exact reason for your singleness. There is nothing wrong with you or your circumstance, and there is nothing better about those already dating or married. Rather, it is just the way your life has been laid out.
You are beautiful, you are desirable, you are loved. Your worth is found in the one true God who loved you before you were even aware that He existed. Jesus loves you more than anything, and sees you exactly as Psalm 139 describes. With Jesus, you need nothing else. You are at 100%, nothing less.
Your singleness does not define you, nor does it belittle you as a person. God is using you every day to further His kingdom and show the world the love He has for it. You are a beacon, reflecting the light and love of God onto this Earth. No relationship status will ever change that. You will be used by God then, just as you are used by God now. Today, know that you are beautiful, and you are worthy, in the name of Jesus.
I have come to terms that singleness is not a label (except on taxes), rather it is a gift. Sometimes it is a lonely place to be. But I know God makes way better decisions than I do and His ways are always better than mine. If I were choosing my own path, I would not even be close to the joy and fulfillment in life that I have today. I have tried searching for people to fill my desire to be in a relationship. But it never works out and thankfully it never did.
I may have periods of loneliness now, but I turn to God who knows me fully and is always with me. Realistically, marriage does not fully solve that loneliness problem. Yes, I would like to not eat alone, but if I have to search for people to fill a void, they will always fall short. There is a difference in fulfilling loneliness and fulfilling the void where God should be.
God is truly good and if you just trust in Him and His plans for you, you will find true peace and fulfillment. One day I may get married, but, honestly, I may not. All I know is that God is for me and I will trust Him.
Being single also allows me to focus solely on falling more and more in love with my first love, my Jesus. I do not have to worry about splitting my affections and attractions because He has my whole heart. That, in itself, is a gift.
My delight is in the Lord and I pray that one day He will fulfill my desire to be married. My motto has always been that worrying never got anyone anywhere. So start living in the fullness of your singleness! Embrace it with joy and peace (Isaiah 55:12)!
I pray that this blog has helped you in some way. We are always here to talk and pray for you! We love getting feedback from our followers, so don’t be shy!